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|1=I can’t put my finger on it. Something about this [[Fire|‼]]Cat tallow roast[[Fire|‼]] tastes funny. | |||
|2=Toady withdraws from society. Toady has begun a [[Strange_mood|mysterious]] construction! | |||
| | |3=Let us never forget the last words of Inod the Stoker, [http://archive.dwarffortresswiki.net/index.php/Fortress_Paintrag#1056 «Aaah! Gorillas!»] | ||
| | |4=[[Children|Newborn]] Zuglar Baldnessgranite prefers to consume Gorilla. A sure sign of his unparalleled strength! | ||
| | |5=[http://www.somethingawful.com/d/video-game-article/duke-nukem-image.php In an unrelated article] — I had no idea elephants could bounce that high! | ||
| | |6=[[Toady]] looses a roaring laughter, [[Fey|fell]] and terrible! Toady has butchered a spammer! | ||
| | |7=The critical question is this''':''' do elf bones yield more crossbow bolts than the average number of bolts necessary to kill an elf? | ||
| | |8=«Dwarf Fortress» … «Как шахматы, только с маленькими людьми, которые могут [[fire|вспыхнуть]], как старые [[clothing|тряпки]], пропитаные дёгтем, и литрами [[booze|бухла]].» … «Ну как шахматы.» | ||
| | |9=Dwarf Fortress has taught me that all the world’s problems would be substantially reduced had our parent civilizations never minted more than four stacks of [[coins]]. | ||
| | |10=Бухло делает всю работу в фортах. Дварфы — всего лишь экзоскелеты для бухла. | ||
| | |11=Мой валяющийся без сознания и истекающий кровью [[mayor|мэр]] только что издал указ о создании некоторых вещей. | ||
| | |12=I can just imagine a wagon throwing a tantrum and tossing all its contents at people. | ||
| | |13=Döbesh Udosdeb has been ecstatic lately. He was forced to eat a friend to survive. He enjoyed a truly decadent meal. | ||
| | |14=Iron [[screw pump]] exercise equipment. Pump iron and get superdwarvenly strong! | ||
| | |15=The violence, aggression, pain, madness, sadness of the ASCII characters never ceases to amaze me… | ||
| | |16=Wait, you’re MAKING animals?<br />—''Torak''<br />At this moment, yes, I am smelting cows.<br />—''Spiders Everywhere'' | ||
| | |17=«Didn’t you read the manual? He he he he… the manual… …»<br />--[[Toady One]] | ||
| | |18=(Compared to real-world years) Dwarven years are shorter.<br />--Sowelu<br /><br />Very fitting to dwarves, I must add.<br />--Sean Mirrsen | ||
| | |19=[[Magma]] is not a [[water]] source. Dwarves can’t drink it or supply it to their wounded.<br />--AlienChickenPie | ||
| | |20=«<nowiki>[B]</nowiki>oats are the enemy of tiles. And tiles are the enemy of boats.»<br />--[[Toady One]] | ||
| | |21=«I went through and fixed a few places where forbidden/on fire weren’t being respected for next time. Burning milkable creatures were still a problem for example.»<br />--[[Toady One]] | ||
| | |22=«You have been processed! Go forth, now, and edit!»<br />--Savok | ||
| | |23=«What happened in 1048?» «Jreengus occurred.» | ||
| | |24=Making rock instruments isn’t nearly as awesome as it sounds --Shandrunn | ||
| | |25=The cyclops I was quested to kill had a thousand year history of badassery, and all of that without the leg it lost in the Year 3 (a dwarf bit it off… I should probably deal with that). --[[Toady One]] | ||
| | |26=[FIREIMMUNE] makes them think that [[magma]] is safe but doesn’t actually make them fireproof. This can lead to some rather interesting results. | ||
| | |27=Endok Cerolneth has begun a mysterious construction! | ||
| | |||
| | |||
Endok Cerolneth, Planter has given birth to a girl. | Endok Cerolneth, Planter has given birth to a girl. | ||
| | |28=«Incendia sunt socia vestra, armaque vestra, fortesque Montis Domi.» «Magma is your ally, your weapon, the strength of the Mountain-Home.» --Eita | ||
| | |29=«Stopped people from giving quests to kill themselves.» --[[Toady One]] | ||
| | |30=«…And I simply doubt we have a need for 7 fishery workers. On top of that, a second soap maker. The hell IS soap?!» --Zero | ||
| | |31=«This is a terrible pun. All craftsdwarfship is of the poorest quality.» — [http://tinyurl.com/6yruly Soup_alex] | ||
| | |32=«The default mental state of a dwarf is madness. Sanity is a temporary condition — a PRIVILEGE you have to EARN!» --Fedor | ||
| | |33=«Why get normal cats? I buy lolcats in the embark screen. Much more fun to engrave about them.» --Yanlin | ||
| | |34=«Dwarf Fortress taught me it was okay to make a suit out of my neighbour’s skin, as long as I gave it a name.» | ||
| | |35=«Got rid of world gen crash during succession after death of prolific long-standing position holders with inbred descendants» --[[Toady One]] | ||
| | |36=«There was a typo in the siegers' campfire code. When the fires went out, so did the game.» --[[Toady One]] | ||
| | |37=«Hey, what does that flashing red and orange text mean? What? Why is there smoke everywhere? Oh god, are those BABIES on fire?» --StrawberryBunny | ||
| | |38=«It’s never 'just a game' when you’re losing.»<br />--George Carlin (if he played Dwarf Fortress) | ||
| | |39=Not that building a bridge out of soap makes much sense to begin with anyway. | ||
| | |40=Note that while you cannot milk larger animals yourself, civilizations can still milk animals «off screen» for your benefit. | ||
| | |41=Tosid Idenarzes likes tentacle demons for their corrupt intentions. «There! Now we’ve covered all of the seven deadly sins.» | ||
| | |42=«Litast Idenudesh, baby, is throwing a tantrum! Inod Litastrilem, Mayor, has lost consciousness. Inod Litastrilem, Mayor, has bled to death.» | ||
| | |43=«Known bug #780: Town guard becomes a criminal after getting an adventurer’s stolen weapon stuck in his body.» | ||
| | |44=«Udib Toblumaid, Axedwarf, cancels sparring in Barracks: too insane.» --Ben jamm1n | ||
| | |45=Kosoth Cilobonol, Bone Carver cancels Drink: Unconscious. | ||
| | |46=Sizir the Snail of Bait is a deity of The Fresh Towers. Sizir most often takes the form of a female dwarf and is associated with jealousy. | ||
| | |47=Sibrek Tanbim likes Limestone, Tin, Smoky Quartz, the color crimson, bolts, scepters, anvils, and rock blocks for their lack of quality levels. | ||
| | |48=Most vermin teleport, so nothing actually contains them. --Fuzzy | ||
| | |49=There are 5 articles in category Lore: Armok, Cave Adaptation, Elephant, Philosopher, and Vomit. | ||
| | |50=Исправленный баг #888: В игре присутствовал аллигатор-алкоголик | ||
| | |51=Fixed Bug #563: Mayor ordered himself beaten for failing to make crystal glass | ||
| | |52=If cow cheese is made from cow’s milk, what is dwarven cheese made of? | ||
| | |53=''Belbezevost Närangagak Äkig:''<br />Goatsects the Raw Red Anus of Stretching | ||
| | |54=Bugs are opportunities to cause unprecedented amounts of destruction. --Zorgn | ||
| | |55=«You know, Urist, you’ve got a mind like an +Ash Trap+.»--Destor | ||
| | |56='''Zander J:''' «Есть какой-нибудь способ остановить миграцию без достижения лимита населения?»<br />'''Yanlin:''' «Магма.» | ||
| | |57=An animal trainer just suddenly stopped working and hid himself in a workshop. He’s probably going to make a wardog out of rock and goblin skulls. | ||
| | |58=flying creatures give birth in midair, leading to tragedy | ||
| | |59=«Dwarf Fortress: Screw mining for fish, we’re fishing for rocks!» -Duke 2.0 | ||
| | |60='''Urdim Kutamèrith, Pump Operator, has created Rakusttenshed, a Glumprong blowgun!''' <br /> Urdim, you are a freaking idiot. | ||
| | |61=<Forkez> I don’t get the game, but I do get that tunnels flooded with water is a bad thing. | ||
| | |62=«If you give a dwarf a fire, he will be warm for a night. If you set a dwarf on fire, he will be warm for the rest of his life.» | ||
| | |63=«Since the Elves said they won’t let me cut down any trees, I bought 50 of their logs instead.» | ||
| | |64=Do not make a trading race that breathes fire.<br /><br />I REPEAT, DON’T!! EVER!! | ||
| | |65=If I ''remembered'' what the &%^#*@! lever did, I’d ''pull'' it! <...pulls lever anyway...> | ||
| | |66=The flood just came out of ''nowhere''!!! | ||
| | |67=Единственная вещь, которая нужна дварфу — это камни. И бухло... и магма... но главное — камни. | ||
| | |68=В: «Как одним дварфом победить орочью осаду?»<br /> | ||
О: «С помощью рычага.» | О: «С помощью рычага.» | ||
| | |69=«Клянусь Богом, однажды я увидел дварфа, который был очень сильным, очень ловким, очень выносливым... и чистым. Но, вероятно, это был страшный сон.» | ||
| | |70=«So let me get this straight. We managed to destroy dwarven civilization while only managing a single town??» --alway | ||
| | |71=<nowiki>::facepalm::</nowiki><br />Спасибо. Хотел бы я это знать три форта назад. | ||
| | |72=«Дварфийский ребенок будучи похищен и воспитан в гоблинском сообществе может бри... бриться.»<br /> --[[Toady One]] | ||
| | |73=Баг #871: дети, рожденные на лестницах, тут же разбиваются насмерть. | ||
| | |74=Известный баг: некоторые цивилизации украшают вещи почвой. | ||
| | |75=Баг #1031: Вьючное животное торговцев, найденное в режиме приключения на старом месте высадки, носило полный комплект одежды. | ||
| | |76=«[[Magma|Магма]] решает все проблемы. [[Fire|Огонь]] лишь сжигает [[booze|выпивку]].» -sonerohi | ||
| | |77=You can’t yet strangle people with the exposed guts, though I suppose that’s now within reach. --[[Toady One]] | ||
| | |78=Look, there are roving clumps of sentient lava outside, … This isn’t going to get better. --PTTG?? | ||
| | |79=…and the only surviving dwarf is a noble who has mandated the construction of crowns and clear glass items to the empty halls. --PTTG?? | ||
| | |80=Adil Idenlocun is conflicted: «When possible he prefers to consume purring maggot, Dwarven ale and Dwarven syrup. He absolutely detests purring maggots.» | ||
| | |81=«I had to leave just before I tested the dwarf with the boiling gold blood.» — Toady the Great One | ||
| | |82=Game Features: How much you ''want''? System Requirements: How much you ''got''? — Aqizzar | ||
| | |83=The carp has drowned. | ||
| | |84=I added two levers. One opens the magma. The other sets free all the cats. --Someone in Headshoots | ||
| | |85="As Manbaspecut, Human Merchant is stricken by melancholy! ""Muskox has gone stark raving mad!"" I think something is wrong with the human caravan..." | ||
| | |86=Somebody needs to build an active volcano inside a fortress inside an active volcano. --Boksi | ||
| | |87=It has stats. It can be killed. | ||
| | |88=Bug #432: Bones pop out of coffins. | ||
| | |89=Thanks. I wish I had known that about three forts ago. | ||
| | |90=If I <em>remembered</em> what the damn lever did, I'd <em>pull</em> it! <...pulls lever anyway...> | ||
| | |91=Sarvesh Ralrubal likes olivine, olivine and olivine. | ||
| | |92=So let me get this straight. We managed to destroy a dwarven civilization while only managing a single town?? | ||
| | |93=Kara Mase, the Glory of Amusing: Engraved on the wall is an image of a dwarf and an elf. The dwarf is committing a depraved act on the elf. | ||
| | |94=Once saw a water skin with red beryl spikes. I still wonder how you would drink from that. | ||
| | |95=Watching a kobold thief be chased by batman is very satisfying. | ||
| | |96=Kol Tölunimush has been ecstatic lately. He killed somebody by accident while sparring recently. He took joy in slaughter lately. He has lost a lover to tragedy lately. He has witnessed death. He had a satisfying sparring session recently. | ||
| | |97=You haven't embarked on a quest — you've joined a religion. --Quietust | ||
| | |98="The alert statuses (i.e., ""Stay Indoors"") have been entirely redone. You may set several custom alerts with user defined [[scheduling]]." | ||
| | |99=There was kind of a violent explosion of boiling human blood when I was testing a human vs a magma man in the arena... it was a little weird, but I guess that's okay. --[[Toady One]] | ||
| | |100=Mew? <br />Chop! | ||
| | |101=If Dwarf Fortress geology is to be believed, then the Earth's core is made of microline and demons. | ||
| | |102='They're firing arrows at us! Quickly! Raise the babies!!' -Urdim McSquadLeader, mother of 8 | ||
| | |103=It started raining, then all my dwarves outside started bleeding to death. On inspection their upper bodies were missing. | ||
| | |104=It seems that a fresh recruit given a crossbow and a quiver with ammo in it will opt to run up to the enemy and bash them with the crossbow. | ||
| | |105=Bug introduced in the latest version: Firemen can have their flames severed. These flames then just lie around the place. | ||
| | |106=You stab Iron Man in the right leg from behind with your adamantine short sword, breaking away a piece of the gas and shattering the iron!<br>The Beak Dog is caught in a burst of Iron Man gas!<br>Beak Dog vomits into the Iron Man gas. | ||
| | |107=Urist McDairy, Milker cancels store item in stockpile: handling dangerous creature | ||
| | |108=Ildomushat, Fish Cleaner, cancels Clean Self: Could not find path. | ||
| | |109=Losing is [[Fun]]!!!<br>--The Motto of Dwarf Fortress | ||
| | |110=I hate walking under dwarven archways. You never know how many mechanized crossbows they have hidden underneath those damn things. | ||
| | |111=bibo ergo sum, I drink, therefore I am.<br />-- Dwarven Philosopher | ||
| | |112=This is a menacing iron spike. This object menaces with spikes of iron. | ||
| | |113=Kogsak is a deity of The Helpful Diamond. Kogsak most often takes the form of a dwarf and is associated with fortresses. | ||
| | |114=The Forgotten Beast pushes The Wrestler in the head, bruising the muscle, driving the skull through the brain, and tearing apart the brain! The Wrestler has been struck down! | ||
| | |115=Goblin Chops at the Diagnostician in the right leg, damaging the muscle! Urist McHouse is Unconscious! | ||
| | |116=Limul Itebdesis, trader has been Possessed. Limul Itebdesis, trader has created Stodir Isethlolor, a Mortgage-Backed Security! | ||
| | |117=The heart wound ended up being a guy getting shot in the arm, dropping his crossbow, running over to the opposing line, and jabbing his stack of bolts into somebody's chest. | ||
| | |118="Giant mole has stolen a preserved prepared giant mole lung!<br>''""Hey, I want my grandfather back!""''" | ||
| | |119=You must construct additional barrels! — Speed112 | ||
| | |120=All I want is a major river next to a volcano with flux, sand and bituminous coal. | ||
| | |121=Do not taunt magma. | ||
| | |122=I bury my pets in gold coffins and my nobles in wood coffins. Pets before people, I say.--KingAuggie | ||
| | |123=[the cavern] is basically like the surface, except underground | ||
| | |124="The fortress' randomly generated name was ""Greatestfailure"". " | ||
| | |125="You stab the Human Thresher in the mouth with your large copper dagger, tearing the left cheek! ""The large copper dagger has lodged firmly in the wound!""" | ||
| | |126=The best way to determine how dangerous a fortress is, is to make only one dwarf with the burial job, and nothing else: the lower his social skills, the more dangerous the fortress is. -- RhenayaRhenaya. | ||
| | |127=Before retiring in the evening, heed my words and give yourself to volcanos — Ted Usmokatra, law-giver | ||
| | |128=Upon coming of age, about 8, Urist McYoung Made an artifact, became mayor and promptly mandated the construction of slade goods. | ||
}} | }}<noinclude>[[Категория:Юмор и истории]]</noinclude> | ||
Версия от 19:43, 24 мая 2012
Единственная вещь, которая нужна дварфу — это камни. И бухло... и магма... но главное — камни.
